Oh. Well... I guess I can understand that. I definitely never really felt like I fit in back home the way I have here. Sometimes, you find where you belong somewhere you never really expected.
Yeah, see? And if she went through the door, then she has to be here.
I felt that way here too, actually. Sometimes I feel like my life was way too boring compared to some, but I began to realize boring also means, to some extent, "safe." And that's not a thing a lot of people could say about their own worlds.
[Even Luz understood she had it relatively good on Earth compared to some of the dystopias others had to deal with. She did her best to stay in her lane].
You know, I don't think I've ever met anyone brought into Deerington who had boring lives. I don't know if it'll be the same here, but still...
[The number of people brought in who had some wild, dangerous aspect to their lives was large. He guesses that's probably for the best. People might not survive what the town did to them otherwise.]
Well... she knew she had to go to it, right? Everyone knew that.
[Worry is starting to slip into his tone, he's not good at hope. ]
Maybe not boring, but what happens in their worlds definitely have varying degrees.
[She was sure she wouldn't have been brought here had she not had her whole experience in the Boiling Isles. Earth was no prize, but her life there, despite ups and downs? They were more or less manageable compared to others].
I...I don't know. I didn't see her for awhile sometimes. Varian, she wouldn't wake up, would she? She'd...forget everything.
Varying degrees of dangerous and terrifying, you mean.
[As Luz continues to talk, more worry starts to leech into Varian's expression. He doesn't know Margot very well, but he knows she means the absolute world to Luz, and that's what matters here. He absolutely doesn't want Luz to be hurt, and losing Margot would do that. She's lost so many people here. She doesn't need to lose any more. ]
I... I honestly don't know what would happen. Maybe she'd end up going back home which...I know is very much not a good place for her to be. [Luz explained that much to him. He reaches out to grasp her shoulder gently.] I don't know what'll happen. But... let's try not to think about the worst-case scenario just yet, okay? She...might be here, still.
[Always, always implied. The trauma never really seemed to have an end].
No, it won't. She loses everything back home. She'll still exist, but she won't be HER.
[And Luz knew, saying that aloud, that it was very likely that did happen, that Margot's time was up and that her found family initially coming Deerington were gone, save for Owlbert. Luz looked down a moment, then took a deep breath, trying to compose herself].
You might be right! I mean, no point in dwelling on the worst! Besides, if Robyn and her wolf friend are here, Margot should be too, right?
[Margot would just be... a wolf. No mind of her own. It's a fate worse than death. Varian really feels for her- she doesn't deserve that. But if she didn't make it out of the dream...it was likely that's exactly what happened to her.
Varian's trying his best to be optimistic for Luz's sake, but this really doesn't come naturally to him. ]
There you go! We'll just have to wait and see, there's time yet.
[That was the problem: Luz wanted to believe that Margot was here, that she was OK. But she figured the first thing Margot would do is try to find her, and there was no sign of her yet, not even with two wolf girls in tow.
Luz swallowed].
I-if she'd not, which is hopefully not the case, I don't...I can't see myself feeling too happy for a few days. I really want to believe she came back, and she deserves to. I won't even be able to pretend I'm fine.
[There were a lot of things Luz could fake, but after everything that happened, acting happy would feel like a slap in the face to Margot].
[He doesn't say that harshly, but there is a steadiness to his tone that was absent in his attempts at optimism. Realism is something he's far more familiar and comfortable with. ]
Pretending that you're fine isn't gonna do anyone any good. It'd hurt and you've got to let it. We'll be around to help you get through it, okay?
[She looked over at Varian, giving him an understanding look. She didn't Margot awake, she really hoped it wasn't, but the possibility was real, and if she were gone there was no faking how that would make her feel].
Thanks. I mean, I really don't want that to be real, but I know that with everything that's happened I won't be able to hide how I'll feel. Margot's really special to me. I mean, we slept in a cuddle pile and everything. A part of me will be in pain if she's awake.
[He manages a little smile- to try and comfort her.]
That's understandable. It... sounds like she means the absolute world to you. And...well, if you need cuddle piles, I can offer those up, at least. Not the same, I know, but still... It'll take time.
She does. Varian, if it weren't for her, I'd have watched my body parts be roasted and eaten one at a time. She got hurt for me then. She saved me.
[She swallowed. Ugh, now she was definitely involuntarily feeling weak just thinking about what would happen if it was true. Margot wouldn't remember her, wouldn't be able to plant flowers, wouldn't teach her how to use wolf speed...she was already getting a lump in her throat].
B-but maybe it'll be ok! She wouldn't have gone through all that stuff just to be back in her world without her wolf mute powers, right?
...Yep, that's still a horrible thing to think about happening to you. I'm glad she was there.
[He hopes that the choice to come through hadn't been taken away from her- or that she'd been stuck in the dream when it collapsed, or any other number of awful things which would have prevented her from crossing through the door. ]
Exactly. She wouldn't have avoided that door- she definitely would have gone through it.
It was even worse being there. There was a reason that I needed Usagi's sleep Kiguruimi's for awhile.
[Luz may not have liked thinking about what she did to those men later, but the sheer hours of torture where they gleefully discussed what would be done with her and how slowly? That was something Luz had desperately tried to NEVER thinking about, because that was enough to ruin her whole day. Sometimes all that was needed was just a scent that smelled of dank, and she'd find herself transported there again with a shortness of breath and suppressed screaming.
The only reason she hadn't felt more freaked out to this day was because of Margot, who she had never properly thanked because she hadn't seen her much after. If this world brought her back to her world without her sentience, Luz would be heartbroken].
Me too. I owe her a million hugs. TWO million hugs.
And it would suck to sleep without her. We even slept like a wolves, in a little cuddle pile, you know? I got CRAZY used to it after a time, especially if it was one of those bad Deerington days.
[Not being able to sleep is nothing new for Varian. His endlessly whirring mind coupled with all the emotional trauma he carries around between home and here makes for some pretty rough bouts of insomnia. Between the kigu Usagi got him and the pin Fern gifted him, he's been pretty well protected for sleep- something he's pretty damn grateful for.
That said, Fern himself has been a pretty solid sleep aid. After the whole...mess with the Waste Quirin, Varian's avoided his own bedroom like the plague. Maybe some people wouldn't find someone literally made of grass as someone comfortable to snuggle up to, but those people, in Varian's humble opinion, are dead wrong. ]
That sounds...pretty nice. And she wouldn't uh... give up on that. The cuddle pile I mean.
[He's trying his best to comfort here, he really is.]
But hey, the tower we have in the house actually helps people sleep. It's got an enchantment in it.
They should be something most people have access to.
[Otherwise she couldn't imagine how anyone was going to sleep peacefully-ironic, since Luz, in this coming month, was going to have trouble doing just that even WITH the Kigus].
Neither of us have had great situations happening recently, but her world had made things kind of worse that way. It became comforting for both of us.
[It was like King, but older and like a sister. It was sort of hard to describe].
OOh, the tower! How do I keep forgetting you HAVE A TOWER.
[Crisis averted, Varian. Luz was definitely a tower girl].
I'm not going to pin my hopes that high. I can't see this new place being that up to date somehow.
[They could hope, sure, but Luz wasn't sure she could see it happening].
Oh yeah, I can't even imagine so many animals gaining human sentience like that! I'm for it, don't get me wrong, but I guess some humans are obsessed with keeping things in a way that feels normal and uncomplicated.
[All things Luz was very much the enemy of].
I HAVE to see what is up in this tower! Oh! I have to show Mabel, she'll LOVE IT!
Yeeeaaaaah, honestly? It looks a lot more like my time period than anything else. Getting big eighteen-hundred feelings from this place. So don't hold your breath.
[He doesn't even have electricity yet, which is a massive tragedy. ]
Of course they are. That's why the nonhumans around this place need humans like you and me to step up and treat them like the people they are- because being a person isn't a strictly human thing.
[He knew there were many reasons he loved her and this is one of them. Fighting for nonhuman rights!!]
A big telescope and an open fire, lots of books and cushions. It's really cosy in there.
Trust me, I'm not. It looks like it's kinda steam punky. But I always liked that aesthetic! I can roll with it.
[Yup, she didn't even think about the electricity part. Hopefully that wasn't the case].
If there's anything I learned with all the people in Deerington, it's that everyone has their own thing going on, and their lives are just as complicated as our own. We're all here for one reason or another, so wouldn't it be better if we tried to understand each other a little bit more?
[It definitely helped being in the Isles and seeing a plethora of different looking people learning magic. After that you pretty much just saw everyone for their ability and just trying to deal with school like you].
That. Sounds. PERFECT! You know, Amity had her own private room in the library too, now I get to have one!
[She paused].
Actually, you know what? What you described actually sounds like more of a Dipper thing.
Well, obviously I like it. If you haven't picked that up already I honestly don't know what to tell you.
[That's pretty goddamn obvious by now. ]
Exactly. We're all in this together. We won't be able to get anywhere if we're too busy infighting. There's always way bigger things for us to be fighting against than each other.
[Aww, Luz. This is adorable. ]
It's definitely a Dipper thing too. And hey, you can't keep the tower all to yourself. Thaaaat said, if you like to be high up, we never use the attic. That'd be free as a bedroom if you really wanted it.
[A combination of old timeyness and science? It was practically made for Varian. Too bad there are other aspects he won't be too fond over].
Exactly. I haven't been able to see as much as I'd like from the staff, but it's pretty safe to say there is a lot we're not seeing yet. Even if you can't see it, you can definitely feel it.
[Shh, quiet, Luz is being totally cool and not adorable]!
What? I'd never! Everyone should get to use the tower! I mean, I'll be keeping it clean and in working condition of course, but I wouldn't dream of hijacking it for my own!
My friend, you have yourself a deal! I tend to favor higher places anyway.
I mean...aside from the magic anyway. That's...very much not up my alley. But yeah, the rest of it is. I'm looking forward to learning more about this world.
[There's plenty here he CAN dig after all. Past the magic. Which he knows he's going to have to suck up and deal with too, as much as he'd like to lock it up and ignore it for the rest of forever.]
We'll figure it out, even if we just have to go around on foot for a while. I have a feeling we'll have plenty of time to get used to this place.
[Hopefully forever, because that had been the plan- to find a new world to stay in. For good.]
Oh wow, you're brave trying to keep that clean. It's...kind of a mess. Neither me nor Fern are good at housekeeping. [Because they're teenage boys.] Okay, deal it is. The attic's all yours.
Magic is never up your alley though, even in the last town. Let's hope it goes a little easier on you here!
[It won't. It'll be worse. Ha ha].
I owe Eda for not having to do the foot thing, honestly. This way I'll at least be able to cover more ground.
[She'll never forget that she owed Owlbert a million pats for getting her through the last month at Deerington].
I lived with Eda, and my mom is a single parent. You either live in filth, which my mom would never allow, or you make things tidy, which I had to do at Eda's. But don't worry. I'll be taking care of housekeeping. That is a promise slash threat!
Thanks! I'll probably barely be a bother up there!
Given what we've dealt with already, I doubt it, but thanks for the consideration anyway.
[It's going to be so, so much worse.]
I wouldn't say it's that bad. [It is sometimes, it really is. Still, he does chuckle a little.] But thanks. Duly noted on that promise slash threat. I'll make sure to let Fern know.
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countryclub2021-08-09 05:25 pm
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Yeah, see? And if she went through the door, then she has to be here.
[He's TRYING.]
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[Even Luz understood she had it relatively good on Earth compared to some of the dystopias others had to deal with. She did her best to stay in her lane].
I...I don't know if she did. She stayed in a lot.
[Now Luz was starting to get a little nervous].
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[The number of people brought in who had some wild, dangerous aspect to their lives was large. He guesses that's probably for the best. People might not survive what the town did to them otherwise.]
Well... she knew she had to go to it, right? Everyone knew that.
[Worry is starting to slip into his tone, he's not good at hope. ]
I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE THIS SAD I SWEAR
[She was sure she wouldn't have been brought here had she not had her whole experience in the Boiling Isles. Earth was no prize, but her life there, despite ups and downs? They were more or less manageable compared to others].
I...I don't know. I didn't see her for awhile sometimes. Varian, she wouldn't wake up, would she? She'd...forget everything.
She'd forget me. Us.
IT'S BEAUTIFUL!!
[As Luz continues to talk, more worry starts to leech into Varian's expression. He doesn't know Margot very well, but he knows she means the absolute world to Luz, and that's what matters here. He absolutely doesn't want Luz to be hurt, and losing Margot would do that. She's lost so many people here. She doesn't need to lose any more. ]
I... I honestly don't know what would happen. Maybe she'd end up going back home which...I know is very much not a good place for her to be. [Luz explained that much to him. He reaches out to grasp her shoulder gently.] I don't know what'll happen. But... let's try not to think about the worst-case scenario just yet, okay? She...might be here, still.
Re: IT'S BEAUTIFUL!!
[Always, always implied. The trauma never really seemed to have an end].
No, it won't. She loses everything back home. She'll still exist, but she won't be HER.
[And Luz knew, saying that aloud, that it was very likely that did happen, that Margot's time was up and that her found family initially coming Deerington were gone, save for Owlbert. Luz looked down a moment, then took a deep breath, trying to compose herself].
You might be right! I mean, no point in dwelling on the worst! Besides, if Robyn and her wolf friend are here, Margot should be too, right?
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[Margot would just be... a wolf. No mind of her own. It's a fate worse than death. Varian really feels for her- she doesn't deserve that. But if she didn't make it out of the dream...it was likely that's exactly what happened to her.
Varian's trying his best to be optimistic for Luz's sake, but this really doesn't come naturally to him. ]
There you go! We'll just have to wait and see, there's time yet.
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Luz swallowed].
I-if she'd not, which is hopefully not the case, I don't...I can't see myself feeling too happy for a few days. I really want to believe she came back, and she deserves to. I won't even be able to pretend I'm fine.
[There were a lot of things Luz could fake, but after everything that happened, acting happy would feel like a slap in the face to Margot].
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[He doesn't say that harshly, but there is a steadiness to his tone that was absent in his attempts at optimism. Realism is something he's far more familiar and comfortable with. ]
Pretending that you're fine isn't gonna do anyone any good. It'd hurt and you've got to let it. We'll be around to help you get through it, okay?
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Thanks. I mean, I really don't want that to be real, but I know that with everything that's happened I won't be able to hide how I'll feel. Margot's really special to me. I mean, we slept in a cuddle pile and everything. A part of me will be in pain if she's awake.
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That's understandable. It... sounds like she means the absolute world to you. And...well, if you need cuddle piles, I can offer those up, at least. Not the same, I know, but still... It'll take time.
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[She swallowed. Ugh, now she was definitely involuntarily feeling weak just thinking about what would happen if it was true. Margot wouldn't remember her, wouldn't be able to plant flowers, wouldn't teach her how to use wolf speed...she was already getting a lump in her throat].
B-but maybe it'll be ok! She wouldn't have gone through all that stuff just to be back in her world without her wolf mute powers, right?
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[He hopes that the choice to come through hadn't been taken away from her- or that she'd been stuck in the dream when it collapsed, or any other number of awful things which would have prevented her from crossing through the door. ]
Exactly. She wouldn't have avoided that door- she definitely would have gone through it.
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[Luz may not have liked thinking about what she did to those men later, but the sheer hours of torture where they gleefully discussed what would be done with her and how slowly? That was something Luz had desperately tried to NEVER thinking about, because that was enough to ruin her whole day. Sometimes all that was needed was just a scent that smelled of dank, and she'd find herself transported there again with a shortness of breath and suppressed screaming.
The only reason she hadn't felt more freaked out to this day was because of Margot, who she had never properly thanked because she hadn't seen her much after. If this world brought her back to her world without her sentience, Luz would be heartbroken].
Me too. I owe her a million hugs. TWO million hugs.
And it would suck to sleep without her. We even slept like a wolves, in a little cuddle pile, you know? I got CRAZY used to it after a time, especially if it was one of those bad Deerington days.
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[Not being able to sleep is nothing new for Varian. His endlessly whirring mind coupled with all the emotional trauma he carries around between home and here makes for some pretty rough bouts of insomnia. Between the kigu Usagi got him and the pin Fern gifted him, he's been pretty well protected for sleep- something he's pretty damn grateful for.
That said, Fern himself has been a pretty solid sleep aid. After the whole...mess with the Waste Quirin, Varian's avoided his own bedroom like the plague. Maybe some people wouldn't find someone literally made of grass as someone comfortable to snuggle up to, but those people, in Varian's humble opinion, are dead wrong. ]
That sounds...pretty nice. And she wouldn't uh... give up on that. The cuddle pile I mean.
[He's trying his best to comfort here, he really is.]
But hey, the tower we have in the house actually helps people sleep. It's got an enchantment in it.
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[Otherwise she couldn't imagine how anyone was going to sleep peacefully-ironic, since Luz, in this coming month, was going to have trouble doing just that even WITH the Kigus].
Neither of us have had great situations happening recently, but her world had made things kind of worse that way. It became comforting for both of us.
[It was like King, but older and like a sister. It was sort of hard to describe].
OOh, the tower! How do I keep forgetting you HAVE A TOWER.
[Crisis averted, Varian. Luz was definitely a tower girl].
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[Stranger things have happened!]
It sounded that way. That her world was just... a lot.
[He smirks teasingly.]
I don't know, I mean, it's not like it's several stories and sticking out the side of our house or anything.
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[They could hope, sure, but Luz wasn't sure she could see it happening].
Oh yeah, I can't even imagine so many animals gaining human sentience like that! I'm for it, don't get me wrong, but I guess some humans are obsessed with keeping things in a way that feels normal and uncomplicated.
[All things Luz was very much the enemy of].
I HAVE to see what is up in this tower! Oh! I have to show Mabel, she'll LOVE IT!
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[He doesn't even have electricity yet, which is a massive tragedy. ]
Of course they are. That's why the nonhumans around this place need humans like you and me to step up and treat them like the people they are- because being a person isn't a strictly human thing.
[He knew there were many reasons he loved her and this is one of them. Fighting for nonhuman rights!!]
A big telescope and an open fire, lots of books and cushions. It's really cosy in there.
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[Yup, she didn't even think about the electricity part. Hopefully that wasn't the case].
If there's anything I learned with all the people in Deerington, it's that everyone has their own thing going on, and their lives are just as complicated as our own. We're all here for one reason or another, so wouldn't it be better if we tried to understand each other a little bit more?
[It definitely helped being in the Isles and seeing a plethora of different looking people learning magic. After that you pretty much just saw everyone for their ability and just trying to deal with school like you].
That. Sounds. PERFECT! You know, Amity had her own private room in the library too, now I get to have one!
[She paused].
Actually, you know what? What you described actually sounds like more of a Dipper thing.
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[That's pretty goddamn obvious by now. ]
Exactly. We're all in this together. We won't be able to get anywhere if we're too busy infighting. There's always way bigger things for us to be fighting against than each other.
[Aww, Luz. This is adorable. ]
It's definitely a Dipper thing too. And hey, you can't keep the tower all to yourself. Thaaaat said, if you like to be high up, we never use the attic. That'd be free as a bedroom if you really wanted it.
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[A combination of old timeyness and science? It was practically made for Varian. Too bad there are other aspects he won't be too fond over].
Exactly. I haven't been able to see as much as I'd like from the staff, but it's pretty safe to say there is a lot we're not seeing yet. Even if you can't see it, you can definitely feel it.
[Shh, quiet, Luz is being totally cool and not adorable]!
What? I'd never! Everyone should get to use the tower! I mean, I'll be keeping it clean and in working condition of course, but I wouldn't dream of hijacking it for my own!
My friend, you have yourself a deal! I tend to favor higher places anyway.
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[There's plenty here he CAN dig after all. Past the magic. Which he knows he's going to have to suck up and deal with too, as much as he'd like to lock it up and ignore it for the rest of forever.]
We'll figure it out, even if we just have to go around on foot for a while. I have a feeling we'll have plenty of time to get used to this place.
[Hopefully forever, because that had been the plan- to find a new world to stay in. For good.]
Oh wow, you're brave trying to keep that clean. It's...kind of a mess. Neither me nor Fern are good at housekeeping. [Because they're teenage boys.] Okay, deal it is. The attic's all yours.
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[It won't. It'll be worse. Ha ha].
I owe Eda for not having to do the foot thing, honestly. This way I'll at least be able to cover more ground.
[She'll never forget that she owed Owlbert a million pats for getting her through the last month at Deerington].
I lived with Eda, and my mom is a single parent. You either live in filth, which my mom would never allow, or you make things tidy, which I had to do at Eda's. But don't worry. I'll be taking care of housekeeping. That is a promise slash threat!
Thanks! I'll probably barely be a bother up there!
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[It's going to be so, so much worse.]
I wouldn't say it's that bad. [It is sometimes, it really is. Still, he does chuckle a little.] But thanks. Duly noted on that promise slash threat. I'll make sure to let Fern know.
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this Varian icon is the cutest
an accurate statement!
Re: an accurate statement!
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