Deer Country Mod (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
reddosmod) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
countryclub2023-01-25 12:08 am
reddosmod) wrote in countryclub2023-01-25 12:08 am
Entry tags:
JANUARY TEST DRIVE MEME!
JANUARY 2023 TDM
A TYPICAL ARRIVAL WITH A SWEET TWIST
WAIT FOR ME
YOU TAKE MY BREATH AWAY
CODING
Another month, another test drive meme! Our test drive memes are open to anyone interested - regardless of whether or not you join our game!
All Test Drive Memes are game canon. Players can choose to keep their TDM threads canon or not. TDM threads can be used for AC and can be used as your writing sample for your application.
Our TDMs serve as a way to build into the actual lore and worldbuilding of Deer Country and we strongly encourage everyone to enjoy and participate! Current players are always welcome to pull prompts from the TDM to reference on the Network or bring into logs as well as tag out to new characters top-leveling on the TDM itself.
Characters will always be able to actively die during TDMs as this is an extremely dangerous world. You can still have this be game canon! Check out how character death in Deer Country works here.
If you have any questions about the TDM, please ask down below!
IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE
Prompt One
[Image One: Bloody Candles]
[Image Two: Anatomically Correct Chocolate Hearts in a Coffin]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Woman in restaurant, dressed in pink, surrounded by mannequins.]
[Image Two: Creepy looking mannequin staring]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Hands touching and holding at sunset]
[Image Two: Girl Screaming with her Mouth Fused Shut.]
All Test Drive Memes are game canon. Players can choose to keep their TDM threads canon or not. TDM threads can be used for AC and can be used as your writing sample for your application.
Our TDMs serve as a way to build into the actual lore and worldbuilding of Deer Country and we strongly encourage everyone to enjoy and participate! Current players are always welcome to pull prompts from the TDM to reference on the Network or bring into logs as well as tag out to new characters top-leveling on the TDM itself.
Characters will always be able to actively die during TDMs as this is an extremely dangerous world. You can still have this be game canon! Check out how character death in Deer Country works here.
If you have any questions about the TDM, please ask down below!
Prompt One
[Image One: Bloody Candles]
[Image Two: Anatomically Correct Chocolate Hearts in a Coffin]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Woman in restaurant, dressed in pink, surrounded by mannequins.]
[Image Two: Creepy looking mannequin staring]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Hands touching and holding at sunset]
[Image Two: Girl Screaming with her Mouth Fused Shut.]
WHEN: Last Week of January through all February
WHERE: The Shores, Boardwalk and throughout Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Mild Body horror for arrival, additional warnings for Blood Bonds and the Chocolatier:
* Blood Bonds: Blood ceremony, bodily ceremony, telepathic/empathetic connections, possible forced/coerced relationships.
* Choclatier: Themes of temptation (non-sexual and/or sexual), addiction, blood sacrifice, severely warped personality/reality including temporary amnesia, inability to use body, paranoia, vomiting organs, homicidal feelings, mild body horror.
WHERE: The Shores, Boardwalk and throughout Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Mild Body horror for arrival, additional warnings for Blood Bonds and the Chocolatier:
* Blood Bonds: Blood ceremony, bodily ceremony, telepathic/empathetic connections, possible forced/coerced relationships.
* Choclatier: Themes of temptation (non-sexual and/or sexual), addiction, blood sacrifice, severely warped personality/reality including temporary amnesia, inability to use body, paranoia, vomiting organs, homicidal feelings, mild body horror.
For those who are arriving, they are fortunate. The worst of the ice and chill of the Season of Bone is fading. Any ice flows are breaking up and it is safe for little squidlings to come to shore, wakers present to help them with cups of hot cocoa and heavy robes to ward off of the cold. Nothing, however, removes the almost bleak and dreary state of the world. All of the beach seems washed with a sort of white that remindes the mind of bleached bone. Transformation from squid to the sleeper's natural form is slower, because of the cold, but does not pose any real difficulty.
Warm Food is prepared in the form of stews, complemented by bread that tastes heavily of mushroom. Unlike prior years, no roses are given to the new sleepers, though there are roses found throughout the city of trench. All of them, however, are black as midnight and there is an ominous sense to them should a sleeper think to reach out and pluck the blooms. Should someone do so, they will feel an increased paranoia about their relationships for the next few days and the natives of Trench will give them a wide berth, refusing to sell them anything at the shops and shooing them away, though there is no outward sign of anything being amiss. Whispers in town hint that the Doorway is in a poor mood this year.
Nevertheless, the patron pthumerian of the month can be seen around Trench. Bonding Rituals remain very popular this month and many seek to curry her presence during their rites. She shows no outward sign of discomfort or disapproval, yet there seems to be more blood than usual on her ivory blade as she stands in silent vigil wherever a ritual is performed.
Anyone who yearns for a bit of sweetness that they might associate with the waning chill of winter will find themselves meeting a sudden and disturbing fellow (CW: Some Blood/Disturbing Content in some chocolates. Please check warnings in prompt). The chocolatier, who was seen in past years, still wanders about and appears to any who yearn for a happier time in the otherwise gloom of the month. His offer is simple. A little bit of blood, for a little bit of sweet. What is the harm in it? Why his sweets even have mystical properties to make life interesting!
FAQ:
* The Chocolatier option remains identical to what happened in 2023, and is available throughout the last week of January and into February. The chocolates offered have not changed this year.
* Blood Bonds are available all year round, and the method of getting one is easily learned from any local in Trench, or from a Sleeper. While they can be performed every year, they are more powerful if performed in this month (Player discretion) and the Doorway is more likely to be present to bless them personally.
Warm Food is prepared in the form of stews, complemented by bread that tastes heavily of mushroom. Unlike prior years, no roses are given to the new sleepers, though there are roses found throughout the city of trench. All of them, however, are black as midnight and there is an ominous sense to them should a sleeper think to reach out and pluck the blooms. Should someone do so, they will feel an increased paranoia about their relationships for the next few days and the natives of Trench will give them a wide berth, refusing to sell them anything at the shops and shooing them away, though there is no outward sign of anything being amiss. Whispers in town hint that the Doorway is in a poor mood this year.
Nevertheless, the patron pthumerian of the month can be seen around Trench. Bonding Rituals remain very popular this month and many seek to curry her presence during their rites. She shows no outward sign of discomfort or disapproval, yet there seems to be more blood than usual on her ivory blade as she stands in silent vigil wherever a ritual is performed.
Anyone who yearns for a bit of sweetness that they might associate with the waning chill of winter will find themselves meeting a sudden and disturbing fellow (CW: Some Blood/Disturbing Content in some chocolates. Please check warnings in prompt). The chocolatier, who was seen in past years, still wanders about and appears to any who yearn for a happier time in the otherwise gloom of the month. His offer is simple. A little bit of blood, for a little bit of sweet. What is the harm in it? Why his sweets even have mystical properties to make life interesting!
FAQ:
* The Chocolatier option remains identical to what happened in 2023, and is available throughout the last week of January and into February. The chocolates offered have not changed this year.
* Blood Bonds are available all year round, and the method of getting one is easily learned from any local in Trench, or from a Sleeper. While they can be performed every year, they are more powerful if performed in this month (Player discretion) and the Doorway is more likely to be present to bless them personally.
WHEN: Anytime in February
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Body Horror, Loneliness, Depression elements, Being Trapped in One's Own Body, Psychological Horror
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Body Horror, Loneliness, Depression elements, Being Trapped in One's Own Body, Psychological Horror
Sleepers have been working to put an end to the strange plague afflicting pthumerians. Still, while there has been success, something seems off this month nevertheless. Even if she is not ill, the Doorway appears to be in a foul mood and it is felt by many. There is a moody, brooding sense that permeates the whole of the city, as if something were supposed to happen that did not. It's the awful sense that one gets when they expect to meet up with someone for something important and, without warning, that person does not show and there's no explanation. That light gnawing at the pit of the stomach when worry or irritation sets in grows steadily worse. Is this about someone specific, or a general malaise? It's hard to tell what sets it off. For some, it comes waiting by the coast in the hopes a loved one arrives this month. For others, maybe someone was just busy and ended up late for lunch. It might not even have a visible cause.
Whatever happens, the dreadful reality settles in almost immediately. As they wait, the person begins to feel their body stiffen. It does not feel like the lockjoint disease, but rather a sudden and whole-body hardening of the person. Within seconds, they feel their body solidifying into a state almost like a mannequin. Unable to move, they can feel a dread cold leeching into their heart as they are forced to watch, to wait for whoever was supposed to be there. Why aren't they here? The longer that they are there, the colder that they feel, and if they are in a secluded place it could feel quite perilous. However, no monsters can seem to harm the person, their body nigh indestructible. The frigid state, however, denies them the ability to sleep or even blink, forced to watch the world as a prisoner in their own mind.
Palebloods are somewhat fortunate in this state. All palebloods trapped this way find themselves able to telepathically communicate with loved ones or people close, regardless of distance. Their voices, however, are always in a state like the wail of a ghost regardless of their mental state. For anyone else, they can manage to mentally connect through the network to plead for help using an omni on their person, though only in Text form until they are released. So, at least they are not trapped without escape, unless by chance they forgot their omni, but you wouldn't be so foolish as to leave home without your phone would you?
HOW TO CURE THE CONDITION:
Several options exist. Anyone with a "Blade of Mercy" (a gift given last February) could use it to sever whatever connection caused the person to feel like they are waiting, though that might very well sever the emotional connection entirely! The very person that they are waiting for could arrive, in which case a kiss (on the cheek, on the lips, gallantly on one knee to the back of the hand. Whatever works for you!) or an apology for tardiness should suffice to warm the heart. If there is no source, or if that person cannot arrive (or chooses not to), any friend or even new acquaintance can try to help the person not feel quite as alone in their waiting through some reasonable means. Any cure-all for corruption will also help with this condition.
The locales do not have any idea officially how to cure the condition, but they may suggest some of the above simply because it seems helpful at the time. At the worst, the condition does eventually fade with time.
FAQ:
* This can happen in a public location, or entirely remote, wherever you wish.
* The above "Cures" are not exhaustive. Any reasonable act that establishes or re-establishes empathy for the person trapped will cure them.
* Paleblood Telepathy is not limited by distance. However, non-palebloods must have their omni on their person in order to mentally link to it.
* This condition does not lead to death, but if allowed to persist is a reasonable source of higher corruption.
* If untreated, it will usually clear up in a couple days, or at most a week. If a player wishes to use this as a form of hiatus in February, they may, in which case it can last all month.
Whatever happens, the dreadful reality settles in almost immediately. As they wait, the person begins to feel their body stiffen. It does not feel like the lockjoint disease, but rather a sudden and whole-body hardening of the person. Within seconds, they feel their body solidifying into a state almost like a mannequin. Unable to move, they can feel a dread cold leeching into their heart as they are forced to watch, to wait for whoever was supposed to be there. Why aren't they here? The longer that they are there, the colder that they feel, and if they are in a secluded place it could feel quite perilous. However, no monsters can seem to harm the person, their body nigh indestructible. The frigid state, however, denies them the ability to sleep or even blink, forced to watch the world as a prisoner in their own mind.
Palebloods are somewhat fortunate in this state. All palebloods trapped this way find themselves able to telepathically communicate with loved ones or people close, regardless of distance. Their voices, however, are always in a state like the wail of a ghost regardless of their mental state. For anyone else, they can manage to mentally connect through the network to plead for help using an omni on their person, though only in Text form until they are released. So, at least they are not trapped without escape, unless by chance they forgot their omni, but you wouldn't be so foolish as to leave home without your phone would you?
HOW TO CURE THE CONDITION:
Several options exist. Anyone with a "Blade of Mercy" (a gift given last February) could use it to sever whatever connection caused the person to feel like they are waiting, though that might very well sever the emotional connection entirely! The very person that they are waiting for could arrive, in which case a kiss (on the cheek, on the lips, gallantly on one knee to the back of the hand. Whatever works for you!) or an apology for tardiness should suffice to warm the heart. If there is no source, or if that person cannot arrive (or chooses not to), any friend or even new acquaintance can try to help the person not feel quite as alone in their waiting through some reasonable means. Any cure-all for corruption will also help with this condition.
The locales do not have any idea officially how to cure the condition, but they may suggest some of the above simply because it seems helpful at the time. At the worst, the condition does eventually fade with time.
FAQ:
* This can happen in a public location, or entirely remote, wherever you wish.
* The above "Cures" are not exhaustive. Any reasonable act that establishes or re-establishes empathy for the person trapped will cure them.
* Paleblood Telepathy is not limited by distance. However, non-palebloods must have their omni on their person in order to mentally link to it.
* This condition does not lead to death, but if allowed to persist is a reasonable source of higher corruption.
* If untreated, it will usually clear up in a couple days, or at most a week. If a player wishes to use this as a form of hiatus in February, they may, in which case it can last all month.
WHEN: The First Week of February
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Choking, Asphyxiation, Body Horror, Dependency, Possible Death
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench
CONTENT WARNINGS: Choking, Asphyxiation, Body Horror, Dependency, Possible Death
Self-reliance is a powerful tool in the city of Trench. You have to be able to take care of yourself, lest the dangerous elements on the fringe of the city overtake you and claim you in the night. Right?
The Doorway could not disagree more. To her, people depend upon each other. Corruption is only cleansed through the presence of others and conversation, connection. Cures and potions are, in her thought, unreliable. Even going to the Blood Ministers is more of a last-ditch effort when all else fails as she sees it. Sometimes? People need a little gentle reminder, a push to get them to rely upon each other more. Unfortunately, what a Pthumerian considers a gentle push to be tends not to be so gentle.
It happens at random, though it seems to happen most of all when it involves people who might not want to be close. You come into contact with a person, and just as you start to speak, you feel your throat throttle. It is like there is an invisible noose around your neck. No visible rope exists, but the air is cut off. You double over, gasping for air that will not come. Even if you don't or can't breathe you find yourself choking like a flopping goldfish out of water! As you reach out for help, you can see to your horror that the person you are trying to meet is choking too! What do you do? There is only one cure to this situation. You have to get to the other person quickly. There's still time. Maybe you can find some sort of solution if you get there. Deep down, you know you just need to be closer.
The moment that the two choking sleepers make contact, they will be able to breathe. The relief of oxygen entering the lungs comes instantly, though there is a problem. Any time you break contact, you begin to choke again. So long as you are able to stay in contact, you're safe but any attempt to break that contact is potentially life threatening. There is no solution other than to hold onto each other, hold hands, whatever it takes to maintain contact. For how long you ask? Oh, for at least an hour. But it's not like anyone's actually going to give you a timer on this. Will you just put up with it, or will you keep experimenting only to be choked repeatedly.
FAQ:
* Anyone can be affected by this, no matter physiology. It defies magical powers, biology and even blood powers.
* The effects last no more than 6 hours at the absolute max and most of the time it will end within 1 hour.
* Effects will cease when the two participants go to sleep (No accidental chokings). As a result, the effect will always start at least an hour before you might normally go to sleep.
* Yes, you can choke to death if you want.
* There is no knowledge of the effect amongst the locals and no warning about it, so there is no real warning on how to "cure" this other than the compulsion to get close to the other choking person and trial and error. Or Patience!
* No, the Doorway isn't sorry.
The Doorway could not disagree more. To her, people depend upon each other. Corruption is only cleansed through the presence of others and conversation, connection. Cures and potions are, in her thought, unreliable. Even going to the Blood Ministers is more of a last-ditch effort when all else fails as she sees it. Sometimes? People need a little gentle reminder, a push to get them to rely upon each other more. Unfortunately, what a Pthumerian considers a gentle push to be tends not to be so gentle.
It happens at random, though it seems to happen most of all when it involves people who might not want to be close. You come into contact with a person, and just as you start to speak, you feel your throat throttle. It is like there is an invisible noose around your neck. No visible rope exists, but the air is cut off. You double over, gasping for air that will not come. Even if you don't or can't breathe you find yourself choking like a flopping goldfish out of water! As you reach out for help, you can see to your horror that the person you are trying to meet is choking too! What do you do? There is only one cure to this situation. You have to get to the other person quickly. There's still time. Maybe you can find some sort of solution if you get there. Deep down, you know you just need to be closer.
The moment that the two choking sleepers make contact, they will be able to breathe. The relief of oxygen entering the lungs comes instantly, though there is a problem. Any time you break contact, you begin to choke again. So long as you are able to stay in contact, you're safe but any attempt to break that contact is potentially life threatening. There is no solution other than to hold onto each other, hold hands, whatever it takes to maintain contact. For how long you ask? Oh, for at least an hour. But it's not like anyone's actually going to give you a timer on this. Will you just put up with it, or will you keep experimenting only to be choked repeatedly.
FAQ:
* Anyone can be affected by this, no matter physiology. It defies magical powers, biology and even blood powers.
* The effects last no more than 6 hours at the absolute max and most of the time it will end within 1 hour.
* Effects will cease when the two participants go to sleep (No accidental chokings). As a result, the effect will always start at least an hour before you might normally go to sleep.
* Yes, you can choke to death if you want.
* There is no knowledge of the effect amongst the locals and no warning about it, so there is no real warning on how to "cure" this other than the compulsion to get close to the other choking person and trial and error. Or Patience!
* No, the Doorway isn't sorry.
no subject
"What—else—have you learned, Ezra?" Kanan asks. Ezra, he reminds himself, is the focus. For good or bad, for whatever it is, Kanan reached the point he did, the point where he did what was needed where the Force led him. Again, he's here for the same reason. Kanan's a part of the Force, as much as he's his own person. Now.
no subject
"History and theory and healing and - I work with plants all the time now," he rambles.
"Also how to get Maul how to make amends to someone he seriously hates, apparently? That wasn't all me by any means, but it was sure a weird moment."
no subject
stings. or the memory of a sting.
"Who did Maul make amends to?" Kanan asks, curious. He's not judging, yet.
no subject
Ezra swallows hard. "One of the few things Maul is really clear on is that he hates his former Sith Master and how his master treated him. Which doesn't always stop him from treating people the same way, obviously," Ezra says, with a soft snort. "But he listened when I told him that he had, in fact, treated Anakin exactly like his master would have, by forcing that bond. So. He let the bond go when we found a way to cut it. And tried to apologize. I mean. Badly, but he tried."
no subject
"That's a big step for him," Kanan says, "I am glad he was able to make it." Objectively true, no matter his personal feelings.
It leaves him with his concerns and his feelings for Ezra and Ezra and Maul. Kanan can never forget what Maul did to him. Ezra guides him down the street because he's blind because Maul blinded him. Kanan struggled with being blind a long time. He's come to terms with it, but coming to terms with Maul having blinded him because Maul meant to steal Ezra to be his apprentice and Ezra continuing to have a relationship with Maul as Maul continued to attempt to kill Kanan at every opportunity— one with the Force or not, that's a different matter.
"How would you reflect on what your relationship with Maul is like for you?" Kanan asks, sitting comfortably in the realm of the wise teacher asking questions instead of the hot blooded Jedi bossing Ezra around like Ezra doesn't know how to make decisions for himself.
no subject
Ezra mulls Kanan's question over. "More complicated than I'd entirely like. He's never actually been the guy we stumbled across on Malachor; he's over a decade too young. This place is wonky enough he's seen some glimpses of events from our end of time, but he doesn't entirely get why I can only deal with him in small doses. And I don't care to give him any bad ideas by explicitly spelling it out."
He's silent for another pensive beat. "We're not friends. I don't think we'll ever be friends. But at this point, I am one of the few people he trusts to be blunt with him in a way he can...take in. I legitimately think he'd lay down his life for some people here I care about a lot."
Usagi. Luke. In a truly bizarre turn of events, Obi-wan.
"So. Weird allies, that trust each other in specific ways, I guess."
no subject
"He witnessed our duel with the Grand Inquisitor," Kanan says first, so Ezra can update his personal tabs of what Maul knows about them and their times. It's Ezra's memory too.
"If he will respect the boundaries that you set, even if he does not understand them, and respect when you do not want to explain them, that is a good sign for being able to maintain a sustainable relationship," Kanan says, "With that, you have to determine what boundaries you need and enforce them. By the Force, you cannot rely on him to do that for you." Or Kanan, honestly.
That's the best he has.
"The rest, I trust to you, Ezra."
Has anyone ever realized how much of being a wise master, even one at one with the Force, involves mentally screaming your head off or is that just him?
no subject
"It's a work in progress, but I think I've got a handle on pushing back at him if I need to." Maul has a whole network of people who's good opinion he cares at some amount about. That helps.
"I'm, uh, more worried about Anakin at this point, for several reasons. But he seems to be hovering at quietly miserable and self-absorbed, not, um. Vader."
Exhausting. Not terrifying and murderous. Usually.
no subject
"Anakin killed a bunch of clone troops in my memory of the end of the war," Kanan says with a frown. "I— I know it's a memory. I know he didn't really kill them, but I knew those guys."
He pauses.
"Not to save Depa Billapa. She was dead. I don't know how I feel about it. They killed her, but they'd been our friends before that. They weren't a threat to him, and they weren't about to kill me. They would have searched for me."
He shakes his head and sends the memory away.
"He confused me in the memory. He confuses me now. I spent a long time looking up to him, as a lot of us did. Right now, when my focus is you, with my concern as you," it's odd to say this directly after discussing Maul, "my advice would be to stay away. Anakin doesn't know himself. He may not be Vader, may not be dark like Maul, but he can still be a darker, more dangerous influence."
"It breaks my heart a little, but that's what my gut instinct, my faith in the Force is saying. I can handle a little heartbreak to do the right thing by you."
Kanan means it.
no subject
He takes in his master's advice quietly. "I completely agree he doesn't know himself. Doesn't seem to want to let anyone in to know him, either. Both of which is always dangerous, but especially here."
Another pause. "I know myself," he says, even more firmly. "And Kanan - he's family. Even if I wrote him off as such, he'd still be family to a whole list of people I count as family."
no subject
"I am not saying to cast him aside, Ezra. Seek balance with the Force. Don't push yourself so far you take on burdens that are not yours," Kanan says.
They're in a quiet spot. Kanan stops and turns toward Ezra, waits for him to do the same. Not wanting to loom over Ezra, Kanan quietly, well as quietly as one can, calls up a tower of dirt, held solid, and sits so that they're closer in height. "If I were to be concerned about you or to worry about you, as your master, your family, and your friend," Kanan says, "I would worry about your tendency to take on burdens, particularly emotional ones, for the people you love, for your family.
"I am so happy for you that you have found family here in Trench. In my brief time here, I also have no doubt that they are put through the wringer regularly, whatever form that takes. As a result, they carry trauma and must process issues. They carry that with them, and you want to help. You help, I am sure of it.
"I only wonder what cost you take on, whether you hide it from them, and how you handle it. I don't mean this to sound like I don't have faith in you. I do. It's... worry hour. You know I worry."
no subject
"I know you worry," he replies, with soft acceptance. He cross his arms, and looks down. "Master Kenobi has said similar things to me...more than once. Every version of him that I meet, to be honest."
Even back home. That is not your responsibility, the wizard of the wastes had told him, about dealing with Maul.
"We're supposed to help people," he says eventually. "It's difficult to know when to...stop."
no subject
He focuses on Ezra again.
"You cannot help people when you so burden yourself you're drowning," Kanan says, "Taking care of yourself is essential to helping others, not something to always shove aside. I know I withdrew a long while after I was blinded. I didn't handle it the best way, especially with you. I still needed it. I needed time to heal and to recover, or I would have been useless to everyone."
It's no excuse. If anything, it's a sign of how poorly he took care of himself beforehand, so that when the big hit came, he was off balance and reacted worse than he would have otherwise.
"You need to check in with yourself and with the Force, Ezra," Kanan says, "No one else will know the answer."
no subject
He looks up, although he knows Kanan can't see him. Can feel Ezra's focus on him, perhaps.
"I never really apologized for...I tried to apologize for the wrong things, the things I couldn't control, about Malachor. But I never apologized for some of things I said, when I felt hurt and shut out. I did need you, and that's why it hurt. But that's no excuse."
no subject
He listens, to Ezra's focus and his words. The explanation is useful, but it isn't an apology.
"Okay," Kanan says. He waits, to see if Ezra will move on to the apology without his prompting, if he's there yet.
no subject
"I'm sorry, Kanan. For my impatience with and cruelty to you, as my family and friend. And the disrespect I paid to you as my master, and to what you taught me."
no subject
He rests his arms on Ezra's upper arms. If he could see, he'd be staring right into Ezra's brilliant blue eyes. "I forgive you, Ezra," Kanan says, "I forgave you a long time ago."
no subject
"And while I have the chance to say it - I love you."
no subject
"I love you too, you little lothrat," Kanan says, laughing but serious about the sentiment. He scruffs Ezra's hair.
no subject
"Ok, come on. Are we actually doing tea? I do have...something else I want to talk to you about. Or a continuation. I haven't quite covered what I was thinking about when I said I could use your help."
no subject
He grows more serious about the 'something else' Ezra wants to talk with him about. "I'm gone for a few years and you build up quite the laundry list," Kanan says. It's irreverent as ever but serious. "I leave it to you. Lead the way for conversation as well."
no subject
"The big thing is-" He's been thinking about this is, from different angles, talked over parts of it, with several people. And yet, he still, at this moment, he flounders. "Did you-" He pauses again. "Before you died. If you hadn't. Did you have any sort of plans or thoughts about how to decide my apprenticeship was complete? What that would look like?"
no subject
He listens to the partial statements, the fragments, the awkward reference to his death. Ah. That. Something Kanan hadn't thought about, as regards himself, until he began teaching Ezra (it's awkward to teach someone, to be their 'master' when you never stopped being an apprentice yourself). He'd spent so much time not being a Jedi between the the rise of the Empire and taking on Ezra that this issue hadn't been a big concern. No continuing to train as a Jedi on his own.
"You had a few issues to work out, and I wanted you to be be able to live and operate on your own," Kanan says. That gets a small laugh. "We can definitely knock that one off the list. You've clearly been operating away from the Ghost for a long time.
"Once that was done, I wanted to find another holy site on Lothal, take you there, and knight you. Nothing fancy. Preferably without inquisitors on our asses like with mine."
no subject
"You make it sound so simple," he says, eventually, in soft, pained, but relived wonder. So much of the insecurities, over thinking, tense conversations - the whole knot of it that he's worked himself into since Kanan died, cut clean through with his master's easy assurance.
no subject
He smiles. "It is simple, Ezra. It isn't easy. We were going through incredibly difficult times. That forced you to face many lessons faster than they would have pushed you at the temple or on diplomatic missions, before the war. Perhaps some of the Jedi Masters would have told me off for knighting you so young, but one, they weren't there, two, they didn't know you, three, they kinda fucked up big time in the end, and four, well, look at you, you've definitely gotten older."
Oh yes, Kanan definitely would've gotten in trouble talking like that to the Jedi Council. He got in trouble all the time in the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. That's just him.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
Action ---> [video]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)