(OOC: Of course I don't want to stop threading with Torpour (you rock, dude!) but I still need at least one more writing sample for my application, and the fruit prompts are too much fun to pass up!)
Of course he had to say goodbye to Nehan at some point, and once he does Shen Yuan heads towards the boardwalk, making disorganized lists in his head as he goes about all the things he needs. Shoes, to start with, and underwear. He's covered from neck to kneecaps, but he knows he's free-balling and that's just not okay. Pants. (His kingdom for a pair of jeans!) And he still needs to figure out the shelter thing, doesn't he? He's probably not an immortal anymore, if it starts raining out here he won't be able to just stand outside looking picturesque and grave without risking a trip to his own grave via pneumonia. And at some point he's going to get tired, where's he going to sleep -- ooh! Food!
APPLES (cw for Character Death and Vomit, toxic fandom behavior, single instance of homophobic language) -- The apple he's handed is pink and shiny, and Shen Yuan can hardly believe his good luck. He wasn't even asked to pay for it! His teeth sink into it with a delightful crunching sound. Sweet, sticky juice freely runs down his chin and hand, and he licks it up with relish, uncaring about his dignity. He's not a peak lord here! He doesn't have to keep up appearances if he doesn't want to! Little does he realize that the next person he bumps into (and it has to be an actual bump, hard enough to knock both participants off their stride) will experience something he'd never wanted or planned to share with anyone, something he tries not to think about himself...
"Stupid author! Stupid novel!"
Shen Yuan crashes around his small Beijing apartment in a black rage, slamming doors and stomping his feet regardless of how the racket he's making might be inconveniencing his neighbors. Like he gives a damn what they think, don't they know Proud Immortal Demon Way ended today? The webnovel that's occupied his every waking thought for the last month is over, and the ending SUCKED!!!
Bad enough that Luo Binghe died in the end, Shen Yuan could've accepted that if it was a narratively satisfying death (and the idiots on the forums trying to call him out for losing his "husbando" are just that: idiots. As if Shen Yuan's admiration for Luo Binghe's abilities and character arc had ever been based on something so basic as sexual attraction! As if Shen Yuan himself weren't straight, and hadn't said so multiple times!) but "Great Master" Airplane couldn't even give his readers that much, apparently. The hack had had Binghe killed off by one of his own progeny, and it wasn't even one of the cool, established ones! If Sha Hualing's son had decided to overthrow his father, just as his mother overthrew hers, that'd be one thing. Or if Liu Mingyan's daughter took after her uncle and decided to walk the path of righteous justice, that would've been TRAGIC but also sensible and narratively satisfying! Even Ning Yingying's kid deciding that actually, she wasn't okay with the way her dad neglected his First Wife in favor of all the other women in his harem would've been better than what Airplane actually DID, which was have an aged and emotionally exhausted Luo Binghe (and what was this "aging" crap all about?? He was a demon AND an immortal cultivator, Leo Binghe wasn't supposed to age!) target a sweet young shimei for seduction and elopement, only to discover that the girl was already being courted by a young man with long, curly hair and a flame huadian on his brow: the son of one of the women Luo Binghe had loved and left at some point decades before.
(Translation: Airplane had straight-up INVENTED a new woman and retconned her into the backstory! Luo Binghe never forgot a single one of his lovers, it was one of the few points in his favor on the scale of this ridiculous, overly-padded mess of a harem plot!)
So of course Luo Binghe and the kid got into a fight over ownership of the sweet little shimei, and of course the kid won because blah blah BLAH, something about being young and fresh and just beginning his great journey while Binghe was clearly too old and worn out and UGH. The usual pack of idiots are already blowing up the forums with speculation on how this was clearly a sequel hook, and Shen Yuan is so angry he feels SICK.
Literally sick, his stomach's been cramping all morning. He hasn't even had breakfast yet, he's too pissed off, but he forces down some water and fruit juice, just to stay hydrated, while typing up his own responses to the chapter update and the forumites. It's very important that Airplane and his idiots fans understand exactly how wrong they are, in exacting detail, they need to know --
Fuuuuuuck, he really is feeling sick. Shen Yuan rushes to the bathroom just ahead of a wave of crushing cramps, passing the door to his kitchen on the way...and just as he had the night before, he doesn't notice that the tupperware he left in the sink, the one that held the leftovers he'd eaten for dinner last night, is lightly dotted on the underside with little green spots...
"Hey," he types into his personal timeline on his Zhongdian Literature account, once he's staggered back to his computer, "is it possible to literally rage-vomit in real life? Asking for me."
It's totally possible, one of his mutuals assures him, so that's all right. It's just Airplane finding another way to make his life a living hell, that fucking HACK. A few other people leave comments asking if he's okay, but he doesn't have time for that right now. Somebody else has left him a link to a fanfic somebody wrote, about Mobei-Jun taking the upstart Binghe-spawn on as a student in all arts demonic, and while normally Shen Yuan's one to let the fujoshis live and let live, today he is in no mood to let this stand. Mobei-Jun would NEVER, he was LOYAL to Luo Binghe, it was the entire point of his character as the stoic useful sidekick who always turned up in the nick of time whenever the protagonist needed a magical taxi service! If some rando showed up and killed his liege lord Mobei-Jun would swear eternal vengeance, not -- not teach the kid how to give blowjobs! Gross!
Also gross is how he can't seem to stop throwing up, though Shen Yuan's trying not to think about that. He can't even seem to keep water down, it just comes right back up -- and even after he stops drinking water, he can't seem to stop heaving, until his throat and eyes are scratchy and dry and his head's pounding from the effort. Fuck Airplane so hard, honestly! Shen Yuan moves from his computer to his bed with a wastebasket nearby, continuing to write posts on his phone -- apparently his quality's gone down a little, people are STILL messaging him to ask if he's okay, but he ignores them. Of course he's not okay, he needs to get Airplane to publically apologize and redact that goddamn stupid excuse for a final chapter!
He's so fucking tired, though, and the vomiting isn't stopping. There's a little puddle of foul-smelling bile at the bottom of the wastebasket -- shit, he should've put in a liner -- and he's not sure how many hours it's been since he drank any water. What was the point, if it wouldn't stay down? His throat's so dry though, it hurts...It'll probably be fine, though, he just needs to wait it out. Just...don't think about it. Let his body take care of itself, while he takes care of Airplane.
Stupid fucking Airplane, with his stupid fucking webnovel...
Open Thread: Fruit Prompts
Of course he had to say goodbye to Nehan at some point, and once he does Shen Yuan heads towards the boardwalk, making disorganized lists in his head as he goes about all the things he needs. Shoes, to start with, and underwear. He's covered from neck to kneecaps, but he knows he's free-balling and that's just not okay. Pants. (His kingdom for a pair of jeans!) And he still needs to figure out the shelter thing, doesn't he? He's probably not an immortal anymore, if it starts raining out here he won't be able to just stand outside looking picturesque and grave without risking a trip to his own grave via pneumonia. And at some point he's going to get tired, where's he going to sleep -- ooh! Food!
APPLES (cw for Character Death and Vomit, toxic fandom behavior, single instance of homophobic language) -- The apple he's handed is pink and shiny, and Shen Yuan can hardly believe his good luck. He wasn't even asked to pay for it! His teeth sink into it with a delightful crunching sound. Sweet, sticky juice freely runs down his chin and hand, and he licks it up with relish, uncaring about his dignity. He's not a peak lord here! He doesn't have to keep up appearances if he doesn't want to! Little does he realize that the next person he bumps into (and it has to be an actual bump, hard enough to knock both participants off their stride) will experience something he'd never wanted or planned to share with anyone, something he tries not to think about himself...
"Stupid author! Stupid novel!"
Shen Yuan crashes around his small Beijing apartment in a black rage, slamming doors and stomping his feet regardless of how the racket he's making might be inconveniencing his neighbors. Like he gives a damn what they think, don't they know Proud Immortal Demon Way ended today? The webnovel that's occupied his every waking thought for the last month is over, and the ending SUCKED!!!
Bad enough that Luo Binghe died in the end, Shen Yuan could've accepted that if it was a narratively satisfying death (and the idiots on the forums trying to call him out for losing his "husbando" are just that: idiots. As if Shen Yuan's admiration for Luo Binghe's abilities and character arc had ever been based on something so basic as sexual attraction! As if Shen Yuan himself weren't straight, and hadn't said so multiple times!) but "Great Master" Airplane couldn't even give his readers that much, apparently. The hack had had Binghe killed off by one of his own progeny, and it wasn't even one of the cool, established ones! If Sha Hualing's son had decided to overthrow his father, just as his mother overthrew hers, that'd be one thing. Or if Liu Mingyan's daughter took after her uncle and decided to walk the path of righteous justice, that would've been TRAGIC but also sensible and narratively satisfying! Even Ning Yingying's kid deciding that actually, she wasn't okay with the way her dad neglected his First Wife in favor of all the other women in his harem would've been better than what Airplane actually DID, which was have an aged and emotionally exhausted Luo Binghe (and what was this "aging" crap all about?? He was a demon AND an immortal cultivator, Leo Binghe wasn't supposed to age!) target a sweet young shimei for seduction and elopement, only to discover that the girl was already being courted by a young man with long, curly hair and a flame huadian on his brow: the son of one of the women Luo Binghe had loved and left at some point decades before.
(Translation: Airplane had straight-up INVENTED a new woman and retconned her into the backstory! Luo Binghe never forgot a single one of his lovers, it was one of the few points in his favor on the scale of this ridiculous, overly-padded mess of a harem plot!)
So of course Luo Binghe and the kid got into a fight over ownership of the sweet little shimei, and of course the kid won because blah blah BLAH, something about being young and fresh and just beginning his great journey while Binghe was clearly too old and worn out and UGH. The usual pack of idiots are already blowing up the forums with speculation on how this was clearly a sequel hook, and Shen Yuan is so angry he feels SICK.
Literally sick, his stomach's been cramping all morning. He hasn't even had breakfast yet, he's too pissed off, but he forces down some water and fruit juice, just to stay hydrated, while typing up his own responses to the chapter update and the forumites. It's very important that Airplane and his idiots fans understand exactly how wrong they are, in exacting detail, they need to know --
Fuuuuuuck, he really is feeling sick. Shen Yuan rushes to the bathroom just ahead of a wave of crushing cramps, passing the door to his kitchen on the way...and just as he had the night before, he doesn't notice that the tupperware he left in the sink, the one that held the leftovers he'd eaten for dinner last night, is lightly dotted on the underside with little green spots...
"Hey," he types into his personal timeline on his Zhongdian Literature account, once he's staggered back to his computer, "is it possible to literally rage-vomit in real life? Asking for me."
It's totally possible, one of his mutuals assures him, so that's all right. It's just Airplane finding another way to make his life a living hell, that fucking HACK. A few other people leave comments asking if he's okay, but he doesn't have time for that right now. Somebody else has left him a link to a fanfic somebody wrote, about Mobei-Jun taking the upstart Binghe-spawn on as a student in all arts demonic, and while normally Shen Yuan's one to let the fujoshis live and let live, today he is in no mood to let this stand. Mobei-Jun would NEVER, he was LOYAL to Luo Binghe, it was the entire point of his character as the stoic useful sidekick who always turned up in the nick of time whenever the protagonist needed a magical taxi service! If some rando showed up and killed his liege lord Mobei-Jun would swear eternal vengeance, not -- not teach the kid how to give blowjobs! Gross!
Also gross is how he can't seem to stop throwing up, though Shen Yuan's trying not to think about that. He can't even seem to keep water down, it just comes right back up -- and even after he stops drinking water, he can't seem to stop heaving, until his throat and eyes are scratchy and dry and his head's pounding from the effort. Fuck Airplane so hard, honestly! Shen Yuan moves from his computer to his bed with a wastebasket nearby, continuing to write posts on his phone -- apparently his quality's gone down a little, people are STILL messaging him to ask if he's okay, but he ignores them. Of course he's not okay, he needs to get Airplane to publically apologize and redact that goddamn stupid excuse for a final chapter!
He's so fucking tired, though, and the vomiting isn't stopping. There's a little puddle of foul-smelling bile at the bottom of the wastebasket -- shit, he should've put in a liner -- and he's not sure how many hours it's been since he drank any water. What was the point, if it wouldn't stay down? His throat's so dry though, it hurts...It'll probably be fine, though, he just needs to wait it out. Just...don't think about it. Let his body take care of itself, while he takes care of Airplane.
Stupid fucking Airplane, with his stupid fucking webnovel...