[those halcyon days of childhood stretching back and back and seemingly an aeon ago - a little closer in these moments just now before they're jerked away like the ocean's erratic crash - and what's close are all the days where vi didn't even want to be vi - there's no golden child in prison, but there is a lot of time to replay what you've already done and what you wouldn't do again, what you wished you'd done differently. but she'd imagined so many things - none of them matched what the reality was when she was finally out.
and she'd made a mess of it in some respects. jinx had been right. she was different. her years in stillwater hadn't preserved her like some sort of specimen in a jar - she'd fueled her own fire, her own perception of what had been and what was - and hadn't left much room for it to be derailed by how things had really gone down.
there were so many wildcards. she'd anticipated none of them.
she nods, slowly sliding her gaze toward her sister.]
Mostly I did it for you. But yeah.
[she'd hated doing it - but the idea of not doing it - of making things one iota more difficult for jinx should she show up again? nope. and making problems for silco? what would that do in the end anyway but make maybe worse problems for her. thinking like this? about the long game? is fucking hard. she's not used to it. it's so much easier to just come out swinging.]
no subject
and she'd made a mess of it in some respects. jinx had been right. she was different. her years in stillwater hadn't preserved her like some sort of specimen in a jar - she'd fueled her own fire, her own perception of what had been and what was - and hadn't left much room for it to be derailed by how things had really gone down.
there were so many wildcards. she'd anticipated none of them.
she nods, slowly sliding her gaze toward her sister.]
Mostly I did it for you. But yeah.
[she'd hated doing it - but the idea of not doing it - of making things one iota more difficult for jinx should she show up again? nope. and making problems for silco? what would that do in the end anyway but make maybe worse problems for her. thinking like this? about the long game? is fucking hard. she's not used to it. it's so much easier to just come out swinging.]